www ... its a heartache .... and a talking duck

What's up? A little longer than some so if you are time poor do 2 things - 1) order some beer for next week (obvs) and 2) scroll to the bit about the duck at the bottom!

Aside from the temperature what else is up? - quite as lot of brewing this week and we seem to be going through bottle sales faster than ever which is good... everyone in the office super happy to go and attend the shop this week as a chance to get into the cask store to pour fresh bright beer in a regulated 12C!!!

That said trade sales over the last week looking exactly as you would expect them to at this time of year...  with the oddity being how fast bottles are going. Don't get me wrong, it is a nice oddity! 

Something sad about Bonnie Tyler passing - I sat opposite a guy at work for many years who - whenever markets took a beating would say "Bonnie Tyler - it's a heartache" - in a tone of yes, I'm sorry for you but that is just how life is so suck it up a bit, because this is reality.  He was a lovely guy and a big influence - he passed away around 10 years ago and so Bonnie T following him is a bit of a bugger and a reminder of our own mortality., RIP AGM and BT! 

We have a philosophical chat about brewing specials for events (team were against my suggestion of a World Cup beer for example so we didn't)... but we do some (Witches' Promise, Winter Sunset, We'll Meet Again etc.)... Should we brew a special called Heartache for Valentine's Day next year?  The right degree of cynicism and humour for a micky-mouse day for most. I know what the fun police [yes you David and Jack!]  at Triple fff will say but what do you think? I think we should!  

We also had a branding guru in for a chat. We liked his differentiated thinking a lot - the guy is a genius... the way we see it is most of you wonderful folks know Triple fff which is cool and thank you - you know what we stand for and what we do etc.. But there is a numerically greater set of people who know one or two of our products but know nada about Triple fff. The current connection is with the few, the you - the special - thank you. For a brewery of our biz model to work this needs to become the many over time. Everyone has a plan until they get smacked in the face said Mike Tyson - but why not look at having Moondance (say) recognised far and wide? Is it good enough? Yup! 100% it is. 

The Nothing Else Matters is ready and is lovely. I like it a tiny bit chilled in this weather but oh my gosh, I like it! Super nearly out of Sundown... more packaged end of next week. 

Drugs are very much not my bag. In our taproom we have - like you I am sure  - a zero tolerance policy. 

Did you see this news article? https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/drug-driving-offences-uk-roads-police-b3011339.html wherein drug driving offences have overtaken drink driving offences?

This isn't good on any level of course and we all want safer roads but there is something that low-key annoys me about the fact this only came out via a freedom of information act request. It seems so much stuff that authorities should be on top of only comes about if the BBC or ITV does and expose and isn't proactively dealt with - it shouldn't be the BBC's job to tell law enforcement where they should be doing things!

The whole pressure of influence on driving has seemed for a long time to me to be in this order:

1) speeding; 2) drink driving; 3) stuff that also happens LOADS - folks driving without insurance or whilst disqualified etc., and then somewhere way down the line drug-driving... but meanwhile the major offender is drug driving! Why keep this bottled up and require a pressure group IAM ROADSMART to get it out there? Maybe I am feeling victimhood that does not exist - but just strikes me that everyone is happy to say booze is bad [to be clear drink driving is very bad, no argument there] but there is this loose tolerance around drugs. We're such a nanny-state already it is careful what you wish for, but it just feels like pubs and alcohol are the pantomime villains, whilst illegal drugs aren't really topic de-jour. Grrr. 

Anyway we can only control what we can control - that is trying to make sure our beer is A++, drive safe and be happy! 

By the way we sell a lot of Satisfaction 3.4% precisely because people know they can safely have a pint and be below the limit - if they are eating or errrr heavier they might be able to take a bit more and safely be under the limit. Just sayin'! 

What can we bring you next week? 

Bon weekend and go England! 

P.S. This one might be better spoken than read, but here goes

A duck waddles into a bar. 

"Pint of Moondance please landlord"

The barman is staggered - he'd not seen a talking duck before, never mind one ordering a fffantastic pint.

"Errr, sorry, yes - coming right up" 

"Nice one says the duck - this stuff is nectar from the gods!"

"Oh yes, absolutely - a cracking beer" says the landlord summoning up the courage to then say - "so... we don't get many ducks in here - what brings you in for a pint?"

"Oh" says the duck "you know the building site opposite? - well, I am a plasterer and am working on the finishes there."

The duck comes in every weekday - two pints of Moondance, a bit of a chat and all good.

On the weekend the sun shines, the circus arrives in town and the folks running it pop in for a couple of jars of Jagged Little Pilsner. They get talking to the landlord who says to them - "Tell you what we have a talking duck coming in here weekdays - lovely guy - bet he'd be quite the attraction at the circus"

"Wow that is so cool!" say the circus guys "a talking duk!! - he'd be a massive hit and we'd pay him a ton of money - ask him if he is interested would you?"

The next Monday at 4:15pm in waddles the duck, orders his Moondance and the barman says:

"Hope you don't mind but the circus is in town and I was talking to some of the guys and told them about you - they would like to offer you a job and say they can pay you a load of money!"

"Oh right - thanks" says the duck "but a circus?? A circus??"

"Yep"

"A CIRCUS with a great big top tent, the clowns and all the animals and that?"

"Yes that's the one"

"A great big canvas red and white tent - made out of canvas?"

"Yes that's right - the circus"

"That is so weird" says the duck  - " with all that canvas what would they be wanting a plasterer for???"

Sorry, not sorry - this one makes me smile. Happy weekend